THAT'S MY GIRL

OSCARS

TEAM WINSLET.

Also, I found my drinking game:

• Hugh Jackman makes a joke about Australia |
  
• Hugh Jackman breaks out into X-Men: The Musical | [close enough! "I am Wolveriiiiiine!" in the opening number!]
  
• Someone thanks their agent |
• ... thanks their spouse |||| ||||
• ... thanks their parents |||| ||
• ... thanks the cast/crew |||| |||| ||||
• ... says they don't know who to thank
• ... makes a veiled plea for work in the guise of a joke about a nominated director or producer
• ... pretends to buckle under the weight of the Oscar |
• Any trip or injury |
• Someone approvingly refers to Barack Obama |
• Someone makes a reference to the recession |
• A presenter muffs their lines |||
• Male presenter makes innuendo about attractive women
• Shot of Jack Nicholson laughing in the audience
• Kate Winslet says "Gather"
• Any award recipient cries |||
• A cutaway to anyone in the audience with an obviously faked grin
• The band plays someone off the stage |

Adapted from here.


|||| These are only the tallies that I caught. MAYBE THERE WERE MORE.

DON'T JUDGE US

Alexa: I also love the Tool Academy
Emily: ME TOO
Alexa: HOW did it take so long for ANYONE to come up with this idea?
Emily: I KNOW
Alexa: It's BRIL
Emily: HAHAHAHAHA
Emily: LOVE that someone is finally calling them out
Alexa: SERIOUSLY
Emily: omgwtf @ the 2 girlfriends guy
Emily: his hair is also tooltastic
Alexa: I HEART HIM AND HIS HAIR
Emily: Celebrity was a DOUCHEY DOUCHE
Alexa: OH LORD
Emily: CLARENCE
Emily: F U
Emily: F U SO HARD, "CELEBRITY"
Alexa: Oh Rob too, the "Power Tool"
Emily: ...I should not be this passionate about this topic.
Alexa: lol
Alexa: You shouldn't
Alexa: And yet...
Alexa: The one with the funny name-Matsuflex
Alexa: AKA RYAN
Emily: HAAHAHAHA
Alexa: Dude
Emily: MATSUFLEX
Alexa: What a tool
Emily: YES
Alexa: GOD I LOVE THIS SHOW
Emily: ME TOO
Alexa: It's reassuring that while we may be single for an indeterminite amount of time, we will never date tools.
Emily: for sure
Alexa: Any variety of tools. Ever.
Alexa: Or at least, at this degree of toolishness
Emily: yes
Alexa: However, we should also take a moment to acknowledge our too long discussion of Tool Academy

Emily: "Tool Academy" is a new label on our blog
Alexa: AHAHAHA

Alexa: 2 tools, 1 badge.
Emily: ~suspense~
Alexa: Now I have to see who stays
Emily: TELL ME
Emily: WHO IS UP?
Alexa: ~commercial~
Alexa: To go home? Loser, slacker tool with no job, ambition or personality vs. Naked Tool AKA Matsuflex AKA Ryan AKA Admits to Owning Man Panties
Emily: BRILL
Alexa: Tool With Ridic Hair/2 girlfriends/a tattoo above his..ahem...package that says "KUNG FU MASTER" and the Tool Who Is Tinier Than I am made it through
Alexa: I really should like, liveblog/recap this shit
Alexa: This is comedic gold
Alexa: It'd be like recapping an episode of "Rock Of Love" with less boobs and chance of VD

Happy Valentine's Day, internet friends

I'm going to the GRAMMYs

Yes, that is right. I have tickets. I will be mocking the show from the inside this year.

My friend Devin is going with me, and he's devising a "hit list": industry big shots we want to hunt down, meet, and beg for jobs. "I have to meet Rick Rubin," he declared. So we'll see what his plan is.

Personally...I'm more excited that U2 is performing. And Paul McCartney. And Stevie Wonder. YESSSS. I LOVE STEVIE WONDER.


My mother mailed my black-tie attire to me from Maryland. Go ahead, ask me who I'm wearing.

Answer: I don't know. It's my "senior homecoming/inaugural ball/won a pageant" dress...and I think we bought it at a JCPenneys sale in fall 2004. Shoes? From Payless, same time period (always the same shoes with this dress). Accessories? My earrings may have come from Claire's, and my clutch handbag was just purchased from Target.

I keep it real.

A New Obsession

I think we should all recognize my new obsession.
What is your new Obsession, you might ask?

Twitter. I can't control myself. I love checking it, I love updating it, I love boiling my thoughts into 140 characters or less.

I recognize that it's just a ploy to get me to compulsively check yet another website when I get on my computer. I recognize that it's really pointless. I do really know that there is no point to updating the world to my every thought and whim.

And yet, after this post, I may or may not check it again. I'm thinking it could help jump start totes bril blog entries.

Also, it's one more website to check 4856462 times a day. Like Facebook, with less flair.